Thoughts on Travel

http://thoughtcatalog.com/matthew-kepnes/2013/11/everyone-says-i-am-running-away/

Faerie

Dear World,

      A tough thing happened to me this year. I don't want to talk about what it was, I just want to say that it happened. If I don't say that it happened, I have this feeling of wandering around in dark woods. I flash my flashlight over a branch and think it is a hand trying to grab me, or I hear the wind sweep through the trees and I think someone is whispering to me. My memories trick me, and if I don't conjure them out of their dark cauldron, I feel they might give me that final, poisonous apple, that they might take over without me even knowing what happened. 
      This all sounds so dreary, but I can assure you that it's not. When I trip and stumble in this wilderness, my friends are there to take my hand, to lead me. My friends run to my side when I jump in fear of a shadow. These beings, these beautiful beings that are unassuming and love without limitation, they are the reason that there is good in the world. When something bad happens to someone, it soothes me to know that there are pure and beautiful people out there like my friends to help the situation. If one bad thing ever happened to me, there would be five of them working against the evil. So when I can't breath from fear, these faerie are there, waiting to sprinkle their magic and whisk me away to a magical wonderland. And when they leave me back on this seemingly-dark world, they make sure to leave me with the knowledge that they will always be there. I can only hope I will be one of these beautiful people one day, and can only hope that more of them exist all over the world. 

Thank you guys for always being there, to bring over ice cream and play board games and just love without even needing to know why I need it. I have so much admiration for your giant hearts. I love you. 

Lucky

                                                    up!
Jumping on a trampoline    
                                                         down!
It seems repetitive, but there's something about jumping that is intriguing. Each jump is unique. Maybe it's in the landing,
                                                                           changing the bend of your knees
                                                                                    differently each time.
                                                                     
                                                                                                    weightless in the blue sky.
Or maybe it's in the moment you are completely of the ground,                                            Maybe it's in the altitude, maybe it's in the actual action of jumping. Or maybe it's in the feeling. The feeling of pointing your toes into the fabric, pushing against the weight of yourself, lifting your arms, and then just falling to the will of gravity. It is the sui generis of the trampoline's nature.
           
Inthew i n d n o th i  n g i  s  d   e    t     e       r       m          i           n             e                 d     

Snowy Tear

Snowy tear running on faded dreams
Weeping with feeling that has no remark
Heart aching with these repeating themes
Dwindling love, weary and nearly stark

She sacrificed her life for him
Devoted her slowly waning love
Living on a whim, on the brim
Not a morning, but a mourning dove

And when her heart could take no more giving
She fell to Earth's embrace, to the day
Learned again to be loving and living
Open palms, let him float away

But her blue eyes will always search, wait
Look for his smile, wait for his call
Count heart beats: one, two, three, five, seven, eight
Each skipped beat a sob or grieving yawl

When will it hurt less? 

Dream

First I feel a pinch from a icy breeze. The hair on my arms rises and my nose tingles. A subdued shiver squeezes up my sides and then is released at my shoulders. I smell burning juniper dancing in from the slats in the broken glass windows. The smell is dark, makes me want to fall asleep again. I curl up tighter into my sleeping bag. 

A deep voice travels to my ears. It comes in waves, louder and softer, deeper and higher. Chanting. The monk next door is chanting. He does this often, chants for a whole day without stopping. I sink into the bottomless voice as it embraces me. Mixed with the cool air, the voice feels warm. 

Suddenly a clatter interrupts the peace. A child's voice mixed with the voice of a few women. They are yelling, but I hear laughter in their voices. Then I hear the clatter of rocks tumbling followed by the ruckus of hooves across the stonework. With this noise I can tell a yak was in the potato field, and the women had chased him right through the wall outlining the field. Luckily these walls are made just so they can be put up and taken down easily. The laughter of the women and squeal of the child assures me that they are all in good spirits. I smile listening to them talk in a language I don't understand but with emotion that I comprehend perfectly. 

Mixing with the woody smell of the juniper is the smell of eggs being burnt over the fire in the house over. From my little makeshift bed of tables and blankets, I know they are making eggs and rice for their kids before they go to school. The mother is squatting by the fire, blowing on it occasionally, while she blends the eggs and listens to the pressure cooker on the gas stove. The kids are playing in the house, but run outside when their grandmother has had enough. Their little, mischievous whispers glide through the mist, up and around me. 

I curl into the feathers of my sleeping bag. In a minute I will have to wake up, address the cold and walk down the rocky path. But first I'll make my milk tea. I can taste it now. I can feel the heat bite my tongue and the hot steam warm my face. I can see the powdered milk exploding into a plume in the tea, and I already taste the extra remnants of the sugar sneakily hiding at the end of the experience. Yes, I'll stay here for a few more minutes, then I'll go make my tea. 

He told me I looked like Marilyn Monroe and I got Poison Ivy

This is the epic love story of a friend of mine as told through her eyes...

I didn't want a boyfriend. Really! I actually could care a less about guys or girls or anyone. Well, it's not that I don't care, I just love everyone so much already that I don't need anything more. I want to be a dancer someday. No time for men in that line of work. The strength of my legs outweighs the strength of my heart and when I leap through the air, I know I don't need a man to catch me, I can catch myself.

But isn't that how it always is? Just when you say you don't need something it appears. And that's what happened with him. Big brown eyes stared at me from under some pretty bushy eyebrows across the room. It was as cliché as that. We locked eyes across the room in the dining hall. I found myself wishing I would bump into him or that he would come and talk to me, but we were strangers! Just two, adorable strangers. 

I didn't see him for a year. Not kidding. There had been no words between us, not even real eye flirting, but I always thought about him when people asked me, "so, who do you like?" But eventually I actually did see him again at a party. I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty drunk at this party. Drunk enough, however, that I had enough courage to walk over to him to say hi. I told him everything... Not kidding. I told him that I had a huge crush on him even though I had no idea who he was and had only seen him once. The great part? He was really drunk too, so he didn't judge me (as he should have). He laughed and said he still thought about me. He then slurred, "willl youuu goo oout with mee?" I just nodded and giggled and then gave him my number. 

He didn't call for a week. But he finally did. He said he was nervous that I was just super drunk. I said that I was, but it was true what I said. Luckily, he didn't see me blushing! 

So we went on a date. He didn't kiss me. Then we went on another, and another. Finally he kissed me on our fourth date. We were just eating popcorn and watching tv. As simple as that, but it was a great kiss. 

We went hiking, skydiving, to movies, we cuddled on his couch, we held hands every second, and we made food together. We went camping once. He told me to watch out for poison ivy which freaked me out and I wouldn't go pee in the woods. Finally I was jumping up and down and like, "we gotta go find a bathroom!" He laughed and said, "just go!!!" I flashed him a huge smile and he grabbed me and kissed me hard on the mouth. "What was that for?""Nothing, you just look so beautiful, like Marilyn Monroe." I turned around, dropped my pants and peed right in front of him. That's how elegant I am. Just like Marilyn... 

I got poison ivy. But I also got him. We've been together six years.

BOO